The Ballad of Jerusalem Artichokes.

My darlings today we are going to discuss something that is unexpectedly dear to my heart. Invasive species. Nutrient hogs, enemies of the free peoples of Fwigf...Jerusalem Artichokes.

Jerusalem Artichokes are (in theory) a cash crop. They sell for roughly $6-$10 a pound. They grow Everywhere, and propagate like horseradish. If there is the smallest bit of them left in the ground a new plant will grow. They are impossible to fully get rid of and are heavier feeders than corn. You either need to heavily fertilize to avoid depleted soil or keep removing them forever and ever amen.

We hates them precious.

"But Mia!" I imagine you saying "your garden has a rule against planting invasive species. Jerusalem Artichokes aren't native to Eastern New York! How did Fwigf fall victim to this scourge?" Well friend, I'm going to tell you.

Once upon a decade ago, one of the gardeners in the community garden where Fwigf is located saw a wonderful new vegetable. They were easy to grow! Tasty! Nutritious! Expensive! And her little gardener's heart started beating faster. She spoke with the garden organizers about bringing this new, rare, never-before-seen plant into the community garden. They agreed.

On one condition.

She must contain them in a lined raised bed. With chicken wire around them. Because there had been the rumbles of rumors of their darker nature. Our intrepid gardener agreed.  She built their box, set up the chicken wire, and planted her demon plants Artichokes. I like to imagine a shadow fell over the garden that day.

For a time all was peaceful. Her plants grew, her artichokes were contained, she was pleased with how things were progressing. Then the squirrels came. Her wire was insufficient to keep the fuzzy minions of evil out. They liberated the artichokes from their well deserved isolation. One by one the free plots of the garden fell victim to the curse.

Some resisted! They covered their gardens in plastic over the winter, in hopes of preventing the artichokes from returning. But alas, it was too late. The artichokes had laid firm claim to all lands within the confines of the garden. The garden was lost.

And so my darlings, we continue to fight this scourge to this day. And so I beg of you, whether planting in your own yard or a community garden, a container or open field, please, for the love of peas and carrots, do NOT plant invasive species. Check before you plant to see if what you're putting in will reseed itself, and if  so under what conditions.

If planting something like horseradish that grows a new plant for every cutting? Make sure when you harvest you don't leave any in the ground. Do not plant anything that will have those who follow you (this can also be future you) laying a curse upon your name.